Client Spotlight: Daryn Vucelik
Daryn Vucelik manages a Real Estate company on Hilton Head Island, South Carolina, and is co-owner and publisher of Lowcountry Real Producers magazine. She also works with past FOM client and coach Matt Walley.
“Before coaching, I had reached a point in my career where I was feeling frustrated,” says Daryn. “Either I was going to have to quit my job, get much better at it or make some kind of change in my life—I was very unhappy with where I was at.”
Matt asked Daryn if she had ever thought about personal coaching. Since she already works with a fantastic business coach through her company, she had never considered personal coaching before. Matt introduced her to FOM Coach Dave Gorham, and after speaking with Dave, she signed up for coaching immediately. “We went really deep, really fast,” she says. “I didn’t expect that discovery call to be so impactful.”
Daryn found that Frame of Mind Coaching™ took a much more holistic approach than typical coaching. “Dave in particular strikes the balance of care and candour really well,” she says. “Though Dave was the guide, it still felt very client-led and client-focused.”
She describes Dave as direct, thoughtful, loving and humble. “It always felt clear in our conversations that he was learning about me as opposed to preaching his beliefs,” she says. “I consider him not just my coach but my friend.”
Dave pointed out that what Daryn thought was her problem—struggling at work—was perhaps a symptom of her thinking. They addressed her mindset, motivations and personal values, which enabled her to hone in on her strengths and apply them to her job. “It has been a complete 180 degree turn,” she says. “I am now in the top one percent of all offices in my company, and I didn’t do that by talking about how I did my job, but rather by exploring with Dave who I was as a person and how I was showing up in my life.”
Coaching gave Daryn awareness of things she felt but hadn’t addressed before. She would put on a happy face around her friends, family and colleagues, but coaching was a space to completely shed that. “Having an objective observer of your life provides clarity in ways you don’t otherwise get because everyone else in your life has a preconceived notion of who you are,” she says. “Dave could see me in ways others couldn’t, he could see my strengths and weaknesses and he could help with strategies to address them.”
Together, Dave and Daryn examined her personal and professional relationships and uncovered the patterns that she had in the ways she showed up in them. “In the past, I would avoid conflict and I thought I had valid reasons for doing so,” she says. “Coaching showed me that I could approach conflict more proactively.” Daryn now goes into conversations more openly as opposed to assuming there will be conflict.
“I used to create situations in my mind and stress about a certain conversation for weeks that I thought would be too hard,” she says. “Now I live with more clarity, confidence and awareness and less anxiety.”
Dave would identify and address patterns in her behavior that were producing negative or positive results. The changes in her business and financial life are the most outward indicators of this. “I wouldn’t be able to do those things without really strong relationships with the people I work with and being able to show up differently for them,” she says. “I used to think that coaching was selfish, but being coached has taught me to be a better coach. Showing up as a better version of myself makes their lives easier.”
Before coaching, she thought that she had to be different people in different parts of her life—there was Daryn at work, Daryn with family and Daryn with friends. “I was trying so hard to show up as the person I thought I needed to be in each of those aspects,” she says. “When I realized I could just show up as who I am, that was so freeing and affirming.” Daryn learned that she is who she is and she doesn’t have to hide from that.
After coaching, a close friend who hadn’t seen Daryn for a year said “you seem so much more yourself, but better, happier and so completely you.” Daryn attributes that observation to her experience with Frame of Mind Coaching™ and with Dave.
Daryn still gets coached by Dave through the FOM Maintenance coaching program. “There are people who think that coaching isn’t for them because they don’t understand what coaching is,” she says. “Coaching is for anyone who wants to show up as a better version of themselves. Every highly successful person you know likely has a coach.”