Murray Newlands

During the pandemic, we've all had to stay at home.  We've all had to stay put. And in isolation, we’ve had time and space to explore other sides of ourselves. But then, at some point,  you think to yourself “am I ready to get back to the real world?”

In this new episode of The Frame of Mind Coaching™ Podcast, I’m SO EXCITED to have the opportunity of coaching Murray Newlands. And he comes to me with a couple of challenges stemming from the role he assumed during COVID as a stay-at-home dad.

Listen in as we tackle the difficulties of trying to get back to the world of job hunting, and the re-learning of how to talk business. Join us as we understand how our social skills may have been seriously affected by not being able to leave the house.

Have you experienced any of these struggles? Let’s talk! If there's a challenge you'd like to talk about on the podcast or privately, please reach out to me at:

Episode Transcript

Kim Ades: [00:00:05]
Hello, hello. This is Kim Ades, I am the President and Founder of Frame of Mind Coaching. And you have just joined The Frame of Mind Coaching Podcast, where we welcome leaders, individuals from all over the world to come onto the podcast and get coached live and in person.

Today, it is my pleasure to welcome Murray Newlands from Palo Alto.

Murray, welcome!

Murray Newlands: [00:00:28]
Thank you very much for having me on the show.

Kim Ades: [00:00:30]
So tell us a little bit about you. Palo Alto. What are you up to? What do you do?

Murray Newlands: [00:00:35]
Yeah. Absolutely.

Kim Ades: [00:00:36]
I'm hearing an accent. Where were you from originally? Give us the story.

Murray Newlands: [00:00:41]
So I'm from Cambridge, England, originally. I moved here about 10 years ago. I was a lawyer originally, and then I've worked in marketing for probably 20-25 years. So, over the last... I've worked for lots of startups. I have run my own startups. I've built my own companies. I've sold my own companies.

And over the last year, my four year old-- well, three year old, now four year old was at home and I was a stay-at-home dad. For us as a family that was what worked out best as the scenario. And so I'm just getting back into job hunting. That change of mind, that change of mindset has been interesting. I... It was, it was very hard to get started, to switch back from... so, an interesting thing about last year was I was learning how to teach and then teaching.

Kim Ades: [00:01:47]
Your child?

Murray Newlands: [00:01:48]
My child, yes. To then moving back into the job hunting process. And that was quite a hard mind change.

Kim Ades: [00:02:01]
What made it hard?

Murray Newlands: [00:02:03]
I just think I hadn't really been speaking to many adults. As I'm getting back into those business conversations and also getting back into... Like, as someone trying to... From trying to educate someone, to trying to get out and meet new people. And I suppose, market yourself as a professional.

And then going through those cycles of finding opportunities, waiting for opportunities. That's been an interesting challenge that I'm going through now. Actually it seems to be getting better, but it's been an interesting challenge.

Kim Ades: [00:02:50]
Yeah. Describe the chall-- and I'm curious a little bit more, I want to go back to your past a little bit and learn, but describe the challenge. So what is the challenge? It's like, "gee, I need to market myself and I forget what I'm good at"? Or "I am having trouble expressing myself because I'm used to talking to kids and the words aren't coming to me"? What's the challenge exactly?

Murray Newlands: [00:03:11]
I think it's-- I think it's possibly lack of confidence and getting back into your self stride as a professional.

Kim Ades: [00:03:24]
Okay. So let's go back. You said you were a lawyer.

Murray Newlands: [00:03:27]

Kim Ades: [00:03:28]
So how long were you a lawyer for?

Murray Newlands: [00:03:31]
So, I qualify, I did three years undergraduate, one year post-graduate and I did my two years training and then I left law at that point.

Kim Ades: [00:03:40]
Yes, but why did you leave law?

Murray Newlands: [00:03:43]
Mostly, I decided it wasn't a place where I wanted to spend my professional career.

Kim Ades: [00:03:49]
Okay. And then you got into marketing?

Murray Newlands: [00:03:51]

Kim Ades: [00:03:52]
And when you got into marketing, were you working for another company?

Murray Newlands: [00:03:57]
No. So, my girlfriend at the time was a graphic designer working for major brands. And I took her portfolio case and I... "we'll run industrial parks" and I sold graphic design and we, over a few years, we built an agency up to 20 people.

Kim Ades: [00:04:14]
Okay. And then what happened with this agency?

Murray Newlands: [00:04:17]
So we got married, we got divorced.

Kim Ades: [00:04:20]

Murray Newlands: [00:04:20]
I went to work for some big companies in London and set up and ran some successful projects inside some bigger companies, and I have worked for a number of different companies that way, and then done different consultings, and had a successful career as a consultant. I say, as well as building my own technology startups, and selling those.

Kim Ades: [00:04:47]
Okay. So you built startups...

Murray Newlands: [00:04:49]

Kim Ades: [00:04:49] sold them, you ran your own company, you've built it up to 20 people...

Murray Newlands: [00:04:53]

Kim Ades: [00:04:53]
...and all the while you were kind of an independent person running your own organization, your own operation?

Murray Newlands: [00:05:03]
Not all the time. Sometimes we're with other people, but both, yes. A lot of the time doing a lot of consulting, yes.

Kim Ades: [00:05:08]
Okay. And where were you happiest? Where you happiest working for others or working in your own kind of...

Murray Newlands: [00:05:16]
Yeah, I've been happy with both. Both of which... Working-- when you're working in a company it's really like, is the team around you great? Are you working with great people? I think the same thing when you're working, yes, you might own your own company, but if you can pull together a great team of people you enjoy working with and clients who enjoy working with, then that makes it a fun experience.

Kim Ades: [00:05:42]
Okay. So I'm interested in the fact that you're currently looking for a job.

Murray Newlands: [00:05:48]

Kim Ades: [00:05:49]
So why looking for a job and why not go back to consulting?

Murray Newlands: [00:05:54]
I mean, I think it's both, right? I get-- the both sets of opportunity are available, so it could be consulting or it could be a job.

Kim Ades: [00:06:06]

Murray Newlands: [00:06:06]
So I'm just-- I've just been trying to network and trying to see what opportunities are available in both sides of things.

Kim Ades: [00:06:14]
So I don't know. It sounds to me like you have this amazing track record and for some reason, in your mind that track record has been obliterated just because you've been home for a year.

Murray Newlands: [00:06:26]
I know, and that-- I realized that that is a... that's been a barrier.

Kim Ades: [00:06:33]
Okay. So I'm going to ask you a different question. While you've been at home, what have you learned about educating your son, or just being an at-home dad, you know, doing the at-home things that could potentially inform your marketing approach that has never been discussed or talked about or approached before?

Murray Newlands: [00:06:57]
I think one of the biggest learnings for me was that I had to deconstruct what I was doing and I had to learn to be better at teaching. So it's one thing to read a book. It's one thing to try and teach a kid to read, but really you need to learn to... you need to learn to be an educator, and there are always better ways to learn how to teach. And often you have to really deconstruct things in a way that you wouldn't expect.

And a really simple example is like, I want my... I want to teach my daughter to, for example, throw a ball against the wall and catch it. She's four. She's, like, quite loves doing athletic things. But I tried to do that and it didn't work. And then I tried to--

So what I did to change that paradigm was I put a picture of my face on the wall and got her rather than to try and throw the ball and catch it, was just to try and throw the ball at daddy's face, which she loved the idea of, and not make the goal-- because I realized that if she just threw the ball and tried to catch it, she would throw it in the wrong place.

Whereas if you threw the ball and hit the right speed and hit the right object, then the ball would come back in the right way and then she could catch it. So really trying to deconstruct what I was trying to teach her and how to teach her it. And then work that through.

Kim Ades: [00:08:32]
So, to me, that's fascinating. So let's take that and say, how do we use that in our marketing approach?

Murray Newlands: [00:08:40]

Kim Ades: [00:08:40]
In other words, are we proposing a new way of coming up with a marketing system, plan, ad, whatever it is that you do. Are you coming up with a way of communicating with an audience differently than you have in the past? Those are two different parts, right?

One is the process of creating a marketing piece or a marketing plan, and the other is a different communication methodology where perhaps the messaging is different because we understand the goal to be different. I don't know. I'm completely making it up, but why am I doing this?

Let me deconstruct a little bit. Because I think you come to the table with a new point of view, a new vantage point that you're not really paying attention to.

Murray Newlands: [00:09:25]

Kim Ades: [00:09:25]
And not necessarily leveraging as you're going forward and saying, "Hey, here's my background. Here's what I do. Here's how I do it. But here's how I want to do it now".

Murray Newlands: [00:09:35]

Kim Ades: [00:09:37]
Right? Based on what I've learned, discovered, and experimented with. And the truth is that your four year old learns in a certain way that isn't all that different from the rest of us.

Murray Newlands: [00:09:48]
That's true, that's true.

Kim Ades: [00:09:49]
Right? And so, how can we apply that to marketing that is informed and bright and new and fresh that you could bring to the table? And again, you know, so what I'm really looking for you to do is to say, what is the Murray Newlands way of developing a marketing plan or communicating with the audience?

Murray Newlands: [00:10:13]
Right. That definitely makes sense.

Kim Ades: [00:10:17]
Right? Because part of the lack of confidence, I'm guessing, and you can confirm if I'm right or wrong, is I've been out of the game for a while.

Murray Newlands: [00:10:26]

Kim Ades: [00:10:27]
And when you're out of the game, it sounds like you're old news.

Murray Newlands: [00:10:33]

Kim Ades: [00:10:34]
And what I'm suggesting to you is that you actually have new news to share that you haven't packaged yet.

Murray Newlands: [00:10:42]
Right. And that then also-- yes. Yep. And the other thing is just being, like, the lack of practice of having conversations with people outside of our household. I think that's been the other thing. And then you realize you're having those conversations, you realize you're not as practiced at having those conversations.

Kim Ades: [00:11:02]
Right. It's like, you know, if you have a great presentation and you haven't done it in a year or two, you're a little rusty. What's the antidote for that?

Murray Newlands: [00:11:13]
I think it's just getting out and speaking to more people.

Kim Ades: [00:11:16]
Exactly. But what I encourage you to do is not only speak to more people about what you did, speak to people about what you've just done and how this applies to a new marketing approach.

Murray Newlands: [00:11:26]

Kim Ades: [00:11:26]
And then perhaps say, I'd really like to try it with you.

Murray Newlands:

Kim Ades: [00:11:31]
Here's what that could look like.

Murray Newlands:

Kim Ades: [00:11:35]

Murray Newlands: [00:11:35]
Yep. Yeah, no, absolutely. I could try and put together a new structure, a new approach and say, "Hey, this is how I'm..." yeah, I see that.

Kim Ades: [00:11:45]
Because I think that that whole concept of deconstruction, as you call it, is rather brilliant and can be applied very powerfully in either, again, creating a marketing plan or deciding to communicate with people very differently from all the existing communication we see.

Murray Newlands: [00:12:07]
Thank you. Yep. Yeah, potentially. I need to think on that.

Kim Ades: [00:12:12]
Does that track for you?

Murray Newlands: [00:12:15]
Yeah. I need to think about how-- I need to spend more time thinking about how that would work.

Kim Ades: [00:12:20]
So I'm going to, I'm going to throw something out at you. Perhaps one of our listeners, or even me might be a good test case for you, for you to practice on. Sure, it might not be, like, a gig where you're already, you know, having a contract, but it could be the place where you get to build that concept and say, here's what I did for these people. So...

Murray Newlands: [00:12:45]
Yeah. I think that's a great idea.

Kim Ades: [00:12:46]
I'd be open to that if you'd be willing, but then again, perhaps some of our listeners might be interested in that. How might someone reach you?

Murray Newlands: [00:12:57]
Reach out to me, I think on LinkedIn, Murray Newlands. I'm easy to find. Yeah. Please reach out to me and say you were listening to the podcast and you would like to strategize on this or discuss it, brainstorm, and I would love to connect.

Kim Ades: [00:13:13]
Amazing. Murray, thank you so much for being on the podcast. I hope that at least, like, I triggered you to start thinking about your past year experience as something that you bring to the table, as opposed to sweep under the table.

Murray Newlands: [00:13:29]
Kim, thank you so much. This has been a great way for me to get some outside input, as well as reflect on my own thoughts. And if you're listening to the show and thinking, "should I come on the show and share and be vulnerable and receive another set of ideas?" Then yeah, I would highly recommend it,and reach out to Kim.

Kim Ades: [00:13:52]
Thank you. Yes. If you are listening and you have a challenge that you want to share on the podcast, please reach out to me.

My email address is

And if you are listening and you have a challenge and you want to discuss it privately, you're not so willing to share on the podcast, please reach out to me anyway.

My email address is

I look forward to hearing from you.

Murray, thank you so much for being on the podcast and sharing your challenge. It's interesting to hear from my perspective that you've taken the time to spend with your daughter, which is I think wonderful time you'll never get back again.

So it's amazing that you've done that, but also I strongly encourage you to take that experience and leverage it. Use it to your benefit, and if you could package it in some unique, unusual way, I think you're going to have as a key-- a strategic advantage that nobody else has found.

Murray Newlands: [00:14:47]
Thank you so much.

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