How did you find out about Frame of Mind Coaching?
I was fortunate enough to attend the Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) Conference in Chicago in 2013, and I heard Kim speak. It was in a room of hundreds of people and she actively coached volunteers onstage. I was reduced to tears. The work that she did was so impactful for those people. I took her card, I went home, and it sat on my computer for literally a year.
Finally, I reached out to FOM Coaching. Kim called me and just blew me away. I thought, "I don't care how I'm going to make it happen, but this is something I have to do."
What were you struggling with prior to coaching?
I felt like I was on a hamster wheel and a roller coaster at the same time. There was constant chaos in my personal and work life, and I couldn't get myself grounded. I felt stuck, and I didn't have a sense of personal fulfillment or satisfaction in any part of my life. I knew that was something that I needed help with, that I couldn't continue that way.
How has FOM Coaching impacted your life?
What even was my life before FOM Coaching? I told Kim after our first coaching call that this coaching was like therapy on steroids. Having been a therapist at one point for 12 years, that really meant a lot coming from me.
Coaching opened up a whole new way of looking at myself. It showed me that I was feeling so stuck because I was holding myself prisoner. I had bought into some very mistaken beliefs that I had been introduced to very early in my life. I had wrapped myself around them to the point where I was trapped by them. Coaching challenged those beliefs and allowed me to develop a belief system that lets me do what I want, when I want.
During coaching, the department I was responsible for was moved to another ministry that I had absolutely no background in. My boss delivered the message to me by saying, "Well, Kathryn, you're the sacrificial lamb." I used to believe I had to be in control of everything and that I was a victim, so I internalized those words. I sent Kim a text about it and she called me right away. After 10 minutes of listening to me babbling on, she asked me some very pointed questions and then let me take over the rest of the conversation. Then she asked, "You realize you just coached yourself through that, right?"
That's the thing about FOM Coaching—it teaches you to reground yourself and use certain tools to get into a better mindset quickly rather than wallowing in it. All that to say, I've since embraced this new job opportunity.
What was your biggest takeaway from FOM Coaching?
The biggest belief that I shattered was the idea that I had to be perfect. Because I held onto that belief, I denied myself certain opportunities; I talked myself out of doing things that might have taken my life in a different direction. Letting all of that go, and now being able to say, "I'm not perfect and I don't have to be perfect," is wonderful.
How has FOM Coaching impacted your relationships?
I'm much more mindful of even the smallest opportunities to be positive and nurturing with my kids. I'm so much more present. I take responsibility for the fact that I can choose whether I want to have a positive or negative influence on my kids' lives.
In my interpersonal relationships—my friends, my sister, my best friend—there were many things about me that I didn't share with them before. I used to tell myself that I didn't want to burden them, they had enough problems of their own and I didn't want to add to their stress. I discovered that I was not being genuine in those relationships and I was keeping people out.
Why did you decide to attend FOM Methods?
Watching Kim in action at the SHRM conference, I thought to myself, "I want to be able to have that kind of impact in a person’s life in just a matter of minutes." After coaching, I had to keep the momentum going. I couldn't afford to lose the things that I learned and the tools that I gained. FOM Methods teaches you how to apply the same coaching methods that you experienced while you were being coached, but in doing so, you also receive more coaching. It took it to the next level and was very insightful. I would absolutely do it again.
Would you recommend FOM Coaching to others?
I plug FOM Coaching everywhere I go. I've encouraged people that I mentor and who report to me to pursue it. I participated in an executive program at Harvard in May and was in a room of 60 high-powered world leaders, telling them about my coaching experience and encouraging them to look into it. It’s a life-changing, transformational experience.
The methodology that Kim has developed is compassionate, challenging, authentic and kick-ass. If you are sick and tired of being sick and tired, then do it. I have zero regrets.