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How to Influence Others

by Kim Ades February 22, 2018

You can have a powerful influence on the way your team behaves, and it’s much easier to accomplish than you think!

My son, Louis, lives in Montreal. He’s a cook, working under a renowned chef at a place called The Willow Inn. He works 12-15 hours a day and is very happy to be there. His goal is to learn everything he can so that one day he can open up his own restaurant.

The Willow was closed for a short break recently, so Louis came home to Toronto to spend it with us. He was busy the entire week, meeting up with all the friends and family that he wanted to see before heading back to Montreal. He spent most of his time with his best friend, Zac (a.k.a. Ronski).

One day, Louis and Ronski came back from a quick lunch at Subway.

Ronski: Kim, you’d be very proud of your son.

Me: Oh yeah? Why is that?

Ronski: Louis bought lunch for a homeless man on the street.

Me: Really? You’re right – I am proud of him!

Later that day, I asked Louis about the homeless man.

Louis: There was a guy outside of Subway and he looked homeless. He asked me for some money and I said, “Sorry, I can’t help you with that, but I can buy you a sandwich.” He came in the shop with us and then I asked him, “What would you like?” He placed his order and I paid for it.

Me: Good for you. What did Ronski do?

Louis: He was shocked – he wasn’t expecting it. He asked me why I did that.

Me: So what did you say?

Louis: I said, “Because it’s probably something my mother would do.”

I shot up a few notches on the proudness meter.

I’ve never told my son to buy a sandwich for a homeless person. I don’t even think we’ve ever discussed homelessness. For some reason, however, my son attributed his behavior to me. Why? Maybe because he has been with me on a number of occasions in which I have been generous with my time, my money and my attitude towards family, friends and strangers. Maybe because his friends have experienced that warmth and generosity in my house. Maybe because that’s how I interact with people in general. Maybe because these are the values I live by – not just the ones I talk about. I don’t know for sure.

What I do know is this:

The greatest influence you can have on others is through the example you set.

As a leader, entrepreneur, executive or business owner – what example are you setting for your team or your family? Would you be proud if the behavior of others was a reflection of your own?

Are you as kind, patient, warm and generous as you would like others to be? Are you confident? Do you feel self-assured and independent?

Or are you impatient and easily frustrated? Do you feel like others are slow? Are you living a life that is less than stellar because you feel like you have no choice?

If you’re not having the type of influence on others that you’d like, let us help you with that. Start by Assessing Your Frame of Mind.

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