Interview with Kim Ades
By Dave Gorham
July 20th, 2010
Kim Ades, MBA, President of Frame of Mind Coaching is one of North America's foremost experts on performance through thought management. By using her unique process of coaching through journaling, she works with hundreds of clients yearly to unveil and switch their thought patterns to ignite significant change and life transformation. She is now teaching this process to coaches all over the world for use with their clients.
A Conversation with Kim
Join Kim Ades and Dave Gorham on July 29th at 1 p.m. EST as Dave interviews Kim to discover how she started Frame of Mind Coaching and listen as she shares the secrets of her coaching success.
- Learn the story behind how she decided to be a coach and why she uses journaling as such an integral part of the Frame of Mind Coaching process.
- Find out how she overcame her fear of coaching.
- Listen to her side of the first one-on-one coaching client experience she ever had -- with interviewer Dave Gorham!.
- Understand the strategies she uses in her coaching process and why they are so powerful.
- Enjoy some of the client success stories she has to share.
- Hear about how her 5 kids handle having a coach for a mom!
- Find out how her husband handles living with a coach...and working with one!
- Discover her plans for the future with Frame of Mind Coaching.
Even if you have never been on one of Kim's coaching calls or teleseminars before, come and listen in. You will walk away inspired by an entrepreneur who stepped into a business that she knew nothing about, a coach who can see through peoples' baggage in a split second, and a woman who suddenly found herself re-married and a mother of 5 children! It's worth the investment of your time!
Click here to sign up: http://www.frameofmindcoaching.com/seminars.aspx?Seminar_ID=103
Kids Corner: My Hero, My Dad
By Grae Gorham
July 20th, 2010
Do you have fun with your Dad? You probably do. But I have a BLAST with my Dad! Want to find out how much fun? Keep reading.
A way my Dad and I spend time together is we go see the Phillies game live. We go to Philadelphia and to the stadium. My very 1st Phillies game was with my Dad and me only. He let me get a pink monkey with a Phillies shirt on it. He also let me get ice cream served in a small plastic Phillies hat. I still have the monkey and the hat.
When I hear the word "relaxing" it means having the T.V. turned to a Phillies game. My Dad and I love to relax. We get popcorn and drinks, blankets and pillows, and we turn the fireplace on. Then we sit on the couch and relax. I love to relax with my Dad!
My favorite vacation was when my Dad and I went to Florida. We went on the Incredible Hulk roller coaster (my 2nd upside down roller coaster ever!) My Dad, my Mom, my best friend in the whole world, Kerin, and I went on the trip. We stayed at the Royal Pacific Lowes Hotel. It was the best hotel I ever stayed at.
My Dad does a whole lot for me. I love him so much! I appreciate every little bit he does. He loves me so much and I feel the same way about him. My Dad ROCKS!
New Genesis Course Starting in Two Weeks!
By Kim Ades
July 7th, 2010
Have you been sitting on the sidelines of Frame of Mind Coaching waiting for the right time to jump into the coaching game and become a player?
We have a new, introductory group coaching program called Genesis starting at the end of July.
This course is perfect for you if you...
- Find yourself in a fog in one particular area in your life and need a lift to get out.
- Need a structured way to sort through a major decision.
- Are looking for a safe place to deal with a difficult situation, be it personal or professional.
- Have a tense relationship that you want to fix.
- Are in a job that just isn't working and need to figure out where to go from here.
Genesis is a 5 week group-based Introductory Coaching Program for newcomers to the Frame of Mind Coaching experience. It was created for people who want to get a feel for the uniqueness of Frame of Mind Coaching and who are interested in quickly increasing their results in one specific area of their lives at a reasonable price.
Here's how it works...
Number of people: 4-6
Number of calls: 1 group, 5 weeks, 5 phone calls (1 per week), 5 weeks of journaling
Participants are expected to journal every day of the program, no breaks, no vacations, no excuses.
Coach: Dave Gorham, Certified Frame of Mind Master Coach
It's simple, it's easy, and it's extremely engaging. EXPERIENCE HUGE CHANGES - The fundamental principle of Frame of Mind Coaching is that there is no greater influence on your results than the way you think. Genesis teaches you what to do in order to quickly realign your mindset, helping you to achieve goals you never thought you could reach AND you get to enjoy the process at the same time.
Please email dave@frameofmindcoaching.com to schedule a call for more information.
Kids Corner: It's Epic
By Brian Friedman
July 7th, 2010
"Epic isn't a word you hear a lot. It's reserved for epic masterpiece achievements; unlikely but wonderful events. Introducing Norwegian Epic -- the next level of freestyle cruising....." and it goes on......and on..........and on.
People might think I'm obsessed with the ship but I don't think that. I'm just really, really, really, really, really excited.
As my bar-mitzvah approaches (next May), I started thinking "hmm, a vacation would be much longer than a bar-mitzvah party". So I told my dad about the Oasis of the Seas, but as we were looking through Expedia we saw another boat that was sailing on the day that we wanted. But there was one problem; the ship was coming out on June 17, 2010 and we wouldn't know what it looked like until March, when everything was starting to take shape. So, I needed to know what this ship was about.
Every day I went to the computer to see if they had updated anything on the Norwegian Cruise line site, FaceBook or YouTube. Every day I would do this routine after each meal - Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner, but that wasn't enough for me-- I had to know things that other people didn't know (like the Prime Minister). I had to see pictures that other people couldn't see, watch videos that weren't published, know facts that no one would know until they were on the ship.
I went to the NCL (Norwegian Cruise line) site, and an ad popped up saying "Get the inside Scoop". It asked for my email, name, phone number and home address. I filled it out and a week later mail from NCL showed up saying "Hi Brian, Thanks for signing up for the Inside Scoop. My name is Mindy and I'm a cruise consultant. If you have any questions, just call me." So I did, every week. And instead of my dad handling this trip, I was suddenly making all the arrangements instead.
You may be wondering why I'm so excited. Let me tell you all the reasons why I like this ship.
1. The ship is a beautiful masterpiece
2. There are 3 slides(Epic plunge, purple slide and green slide)
3. The Epic plunge is a tube slide that goes into a bowl and then you go into the middle which takes you down to the end.
4. The chandelier over "Taste"(restaurant) is 25 ft tall
5. The pool deck is HUGE!!!
6. The rooms are stunning
7. It has a bungee trampoline
8. There are bowling alleys
9. They have a big top-style restaurant with Cirque Dreams and Dinner performing
10. Legends in Concert is headlining in The Manhattan Room and Headliners Club
11. The Second City Comedy Troupe is performing in Headliners
12. There is Nickelodeon at sea
13. There is an ice rink
14. There is a rock climbing wall with rappelling
15. There are 21 dining options
16. The itinerary is amazing
17. The clubs are really nice
18. The ship is 19 decks high
19. Biggest spa at sea
20. Biggest casino at sea
And much, much, much more!!!
From this list, wouldn't you want to go on the ship too?!?!?!?!?!?!?
From the moment that I saw the ship, I decided that I needed to be on it. Someone wise once told me that "What you Focus on GROWS", so now I am going to be sailing on the amazing, fantastic, extravagant NORWEGIAN EPIC!!!!
An Epic Obsession
By Kim Ades
July 7th, 2010
I wrote a book called "What You Focus on Grows: Stories For Your Frame of Mind". It was published in 2008 and it's a compilation of entertaining short stories based on real life observations that look at life through a unique lens. While each story stands on its own and is unrelated to the other stories, the basic premise of the book is that whatever you place your attention on is what expands in your life's experience. When you focus on looking for interesting things, they show up. When you focus on noticing the annoyances of life, they show up too, in bulk. My intention in the book was to focus on human behaviour as it showed up over a wide range of age ranges, circumstances, and life experiences, as a reflection of mindset. My stories covered a wide range of subjects and people -- from superstars who accomplished great things, to people I encountered for 30 seconds in an elevator, to exchanges I shared with important people in my life.
The one thing I never really addressed in the book was the issue of obsession. Obsession is an extreme version of the notion that what you focus on grows. What you obsess about not only grows, it magnifies. This can work in both directions. Obsessing about what is missing in your life can make the absence feel massively overwhelming, while obsessing with glee and anticipation over an event that will take place in the future can extend the pleasure of the event substantially longer than the event itself. Many of us are quite familiar with the former, but not all that exposed to the latter. Over the past six months, I have had the pleasure of witnessing my stepson, Brian, in a state of obsession; the excitement and glee kind of obsession, over the Norwegian Epic.
What is the Norwegian Epic? It's a brand new cruise ship that sailed this week out of Florida for the first time ever. According to Brian, it is an Epic Masterpiece (or maybe that's from the marketing lingo on the website). It's a ship that has every feature and attraction that one can imagine. It has freestyle dining with 21 different dining options, Cirque du Soleil performances with dinner, the Blue Man Group, Second City, an ice skating rink, a bowling alley, a 3 storey water slide, a bungee trampoline, an ice bar and much, much more! It's the biggest, funkiest, most exciting ship ever. How do I know all this?
- Because Brian gave up his Bar Mitzvah Party in exchange for a family vacation on the Epic.
- Because Brian memorized the 5 minute audio component of the Epic website and repeats it whenever he has a chance.
- Because Brian has been following the construction of the ship and giving us daily updates.
- Because Brian keeps luring us to his computer to see the latest pictures and YouTube videos that are available.
- Because there is NOT ONE PASSING DAY that he does not talk about the Norwegian Epic. In fact, today he is off school and is hanging out at work with us... he just walked into my office carrying a massive whiteboard, the size of his whole body, with the word EPIC written across the board. He has already planned all of our meals every night as well as his daily activities from the minute he gets on the ship to the minute he gets off. He is OBSESSED.
How does this obsession serve him? It serves as an extraordinarily powerful energy source that allows him to enjoy every minute leading up to this dream trip far before the actual trip takes place. He has imagined it, envisioned it, and taken the trip in his mind at least a hundred times already. This is a commanding skill that most of us have no idea how to harness. It's a skill that creates magic and allows for the most unbelievable results to come about. It's a skill that the most successful people in the world have nailed.
Here's what I recommend: use a journal to become obsessive about imagining what you want, as though you already have it. Imagine it as a done deal and revel in the enjoyment of its existence in your life. Your written word influences your thinking and allows you to determine exactly what it is that you want to focus on. It is powerful beyond comprehension.
Brian decided he wanted to go on the Epic and there was no turning back. For him, it was a done deal and from that point on he has enjoyed every part of the process. Imagine what his life would have been like if he focused on how lucky *other* people were to get to go on cruises? Imagine what the past six months would have been like if he kept moaning and groaning about the unfairness of it all. Those six months would have been miserable for him (and for us)! Instead, his obsession has landed him months and months of pleasure *and* a trip of a lifetime, instead of just 7 days at sea!
What You Focus On Grows: Free Teleseminar
By Kim Ades
June 29th, 2010
"What You Focus on Grows" is one of the most powerful Frame of Mind Coaching Principles that we teach our coaching clients.
In fact, it is so powerful, that I wrote a book and called it "What You Focus on Grows: Stories for your Frame of Mind." It is the basic principle that we use to understand and make sense of our clients' life experiences, both good and bad.
What You Focus On Grows is the theme of our next Teleseminar, happening Thursday, July 1st at 3 p.m. EST. I'd like to invite you to join me on the call.
Actually, I'd like to invite you to take advantage of the opportunity to be coached on the call.
I will personally coach a handful of people and uncover the thinking patterns and beliefs that hold them back...beliefs that they aren't even aware that they focus on.
Would YOU like to be coached? If you are open to it, this experience could change the way you think, the way you see the world, the way you communicate, and the way you accomplish your goals.
Through the use of one journal entry and a series of questions, I will reveal the personal thinking blueprint that drives the results you are achieving (or not achieving) in all areas of your life, both personally and professionally.
Understanding your current thinking blueprint and strategically designing it to help you attain your objectives is truly the secret to massive success. But it can not be done and sustained without understanding your personal blueprint first.
Join me on Thursday, July 1st at 3 p.m. EST and experience it firsthand.
Click Here to Sign up Now!
And Click Here to submit your journal entry.
The Yoga Monster
By Kim Ades
August 3rd, 2010
It's amazing what you can learn while waiting in line. My lesson came one day at the grocery store, standing next to a neighbour with her three-year-old son Jake, who was in the mood to chat.
"Today at school we learned about monsters."
"Oh, like trolls and dragons?"
"No, this is a nice monster. A yoga monster. My yoga teacher Elizabeth said it makes you feel calm and relaxed and happy."
Puzzled, I tried to follow his thoughts. "Were you reading a story? Or maybe doing the lion pose?"
"No. It's after you do all of the poses and you lie down and relax, like at nap time. Then you say ohm."
Eureka. The light bulb finally went off in my head. "Oh! You mean a yoga mantra."
"Yes. That's what I told you, a yoga monster."
His mom and I shared a chuckle, but as I wrote about the conversation in my journal later that day, my amusement turned to admiration. Jake, at the tender age of three, had challenged the traditional view that monsters are horrible beings. He had been open to the possibility that some monsters are quite nice. Some make you feel happy and relaxed.
As adults, we know that such creatures don't exist. And yet we walk around every day with our own personal monsters. These demons may be something from our past, tainting the way we approach our present lives. Or they can be challenges that drag us down every day, until we are drained of energy. They can affect the way we function, and can even control our happiness.
But by recognizing and identifying these monsters - pulling them kicking and screaming into the light - we have the opportunity to take away their power over us. We have the ability turn these monsters into something good - something that makes us relaxed and happy.
Just like the yoga monster. Ohm!
Grappling with Grapple
By Janice Quirt
July 20th, 2010
It began as an innocent kitchen experiment, a father spending time with his three daughters. We were at juice critical stage, with only smidgens of apple juice and grape juice left. Although relatively new to the juice run, my father knew that at our young ages, equality trumped individuality - we all had to have the same darn type of juice. In a moment of inspiration born of necessity, my father combined the two and produced, with a wave of his magic wand (wooden spoon): Grapple!
An early adopter even at this young age, my eldest sister stepped right up and pronounced grapple to be delicious. My middle sister, more tentative, beamed a surprised smile after the tasting. My father soon had them in fits of giggles, pretending to be a mad scientist concocting secret grapple potions in his laboratory.
When my turn came to sample the magical grapple, I froze.
I wanted to try the juice. I wanted even more to join in the fun. Grapple looked good; heck, it even smelled good. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't bring myself to try even the smallest sip.
Sensing I was close to tears, but not sure why, my father ended the game with the promise of ping pong. My sisters soon forgot all about grapple.
But I didn't.
Looking back, it seems that all of my childhood fears, shyness and hesitancy are represented by grapple. There were often times when I didn't participate in a trip, event or party because something held me back. I almost always regretted not going, or trying the new adventure, but even armed with that insight, the same situation tended to play out.
When I got older, gained more confidence, and started to participate more fully, my life was always more enriched. Trips overseas, challenging ropes courses, even new jobs often possessed many hurdles and setbacks, but the gains were almost always worth it.
Now a mother, I see my son confront his own grapple. He so badly wants to play with the older kids in their advanced games but is shy, holding back, uncertain how to proceed. When he does get involved, he talks about these experiences for weeks - clearly they are memorable.
So it's not just me who has a grapple; my son does too. What is your own personal grapple - what do you want to try or experience? What is stopping you for jumping in? Do you agree that we tend to regret the things that we don't do rather than the things that we do?
Take a moment to write down what you want to try or experience. Then look at what is holding you back - and knock down those barriers.
Because grapple is delicious.
Janice Quirt is a member of the Frame of Mind Coaching Community and is an avid Journaler.
Kids Corner: Done With Grade 5!!!
By Ferne Kotlyar
June 29th, 2010
Yes! It's the end of the year and I am finally done with grade 5. Although this year went by really fast, my teacher was not the best. Sometimes she was nice and gave us candy, but then sometimes she was not so nice. She always gave the boys more time in gym. For proof, a girl in my class even timed it.
At the beginning of the year, I didn't believe my teacher liked me. In the past, I always did well in math and I never got lower than an A. In her class after wrote a math test, she gave me a B+. I noticed that she made a mistake in her marking. So I went to tell her and she said "no, you cheated!" That didn't feel so good. Even my friend told her I would never cheat and still, she said "no" and did not fix my mark. You are probably thinking that it's just one mark and that it's not going to change my total grade, so what's the big deal? But you would be wrong. My teacher rounds her decimals on her test papers and I was only one decimal point away from getting an A. That's why I wanted that mark so badly.
Luckily near the end of the year my teacher started to like me because I was good student. I always raised my hand and did my homework and I never got in trouble.
Although my teacher was not the best, she was not as bad as I thought and I learned a lot from her. I learned that even if I don't like my teacher too much, I can still focus and get good marks, like an A in math!
Is the Grass Really Greener on the Other Side?
By Kim Ades
June 29th, 2010
I coach a lot of people who are in a state of dissatisfaction with something in their lives.
Their marriages are not what they used to be, their jobs are not what they expected, their kids are not behaving with respect, and they wonder what it would be like to live a completely different life. They imagine themselves somewhere else - with a different spouse, or without a partner all together, living in a different house or a different country, going to a different job, and living without the day to day responsibility of taking care of their kids. They look at people who live like this and they feel slighted with their lot in life.
This is not what they pictured for themselves when they were younger. They thought it would be more fulfilling, more exciting, and far less mediocre. The gap between what they imagined and what they are, in fact, experiencing is too big to ignore.
So they begin to consider their options. Get divorced? Have an affair? Find a new career? Sell their home? Get a motorcycle? Not only does the search begin, but so does the experimenting with substances, gambling, thrill seeking activities, and outside sexual adventures on the hunt for more 'passion and affection'. For a while, it breaks up the monotony and injects a bit of spice into their routine. They feel young again and full of vigour but still something is missing. After a short while they find themselves dissatisfied once more. They don't understand why the new job didn't work out or the affair didn't last or the motorcycle didn't give them the thrill they were seeking for any extended period of time.
Here is the answer... when people travel over to the other side where the grass is greener, there is something that follows them... themselves. And this is inescapable. So they become confused, agitated, and in a fog about where they are, where they have come from and which direction to go from here. They don't understand that if they don't really address their frame of mind, their troubles follow them wherever they go. They keep chasing some elusive thing, that doesn't actually exist out there but rather is born from one's own thinking and mindset. If one lives a life of purpose, whatever that means, agitation and dissatisfaction is a far distance away. You really don't need to change your home or your car or your spouse in order to experience passion or meaning. You need to come to the table equipped with enough of it so that you can even spread it around.
The key lesson is this... the grass in NEVER greener anywhere else. The grass, wherever you are, is only ever as green as your own passion, meaning, and vision allow it to be. If your own grass is not as green as you would like it to be, understand that it's a function of the lens you are looking through. If you want to experience a different life, before you make a major change, try changing your lens first. Do the work that is necessary to feel passionate, regardless of circumstance. Pick up the skill set that allows you to use your mindset to create the life that you always imagined.
Is it worth it? You can spend a life time of looking for greener pastures only to continue to find them in someone else's backyard or find a way to be a better gardener and grow the greenest yard in your neighbourhood! You decide.
